Too much time on my hands…

Makes me an idle person.  This is a sad fact that I am coming to realize about myself while here in Greece.

I am having a great time.

I am learning much about my inner self, how I function, what sets me off, patterns I get into, etc.

God willing, I am making a small difference in the clash of the kingdoms currently raging in the world.

I am trying to learn courage, how to beat down my fears and anxieties, and ultimately to trust the Creator God who is always with me and loves me.

But I still feel…idle.  Like I should be doing something I’m not.  But what?

I am coming to understand the Greek saying, “I am too bored [to do whatever].”  My motivation is slipping, as is my discipline.  Yuck.

I am also coming to realize just how much time I spend thinking about myself, doing things to make myself better, trying to improve my life.  What am I doing for others, what am I doing for the world?  What am I doing for the kingdom?  What passion am I not pursuing, am I not feeding, am I not nurturing?

And why do I always talk about myself in this blog?  It is a place to express my thoughts…but why?  Why is it always about me?  (Metaphorically folds arms, pouts lips, and sits down with a frustrated attitude.)

God help me.

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About rd734467

I am a seeker. A doer. An encourager. One who loves. One who longs to be loved. One who desperately yearns to make a difference in this world.
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